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If you went back in time and told me that I would be doing a column based entirely on the divas, I’d have checked you into a padded room. I’ve always been trained to see women’s wrestling as filler, believing how Homer Simpson once so eloquently put it: “Girls should stick to girl sports, like hot oil wrestling or foxy boxing.†I’m not out to disrespect what the divas do in the wrestling business though, by any stretch. It’s just hard to see women’s wrestling as serious when WWE has trained its fans to believe that each woman on its roster is eye candy, and one stands out from the pack simply because she’s given a belt.
Realistically, a women’s title match is never going to be the main event at Wrestlemania and will likely not bring a wealth of fans to the table, but it can serve its purpose. Obviously, any woman out there should have just as many opportunities as any man in world to wrestle, but that purpose as it looks today is to be filler. That doesn’t mean that it can’t be entertaining filler.
Since the brand extension, I’ve noticed a standard in women’s wrestling. The talented wrestlers were shipped to Raw, with few random centerfolds here and there to fill it out. There’d be real competition on a weekly basis revolving around the WWE Women’s Title. Over on Smackdown, the centerfolds dominated the women’s portion of the roster. Sure there’d be one or two talents on the roster, but the main function of these divas was to wrestle in pudding or pose in swimsuit competitions.
Today’s WWE is much different by comparison. With the brand split virtually non-existent in some areas, it’s not out of place to see someone like Michelle McCool from Smackdown show up on Raw or ECW. This is a step in the right direction considering the total number (18 not counting Lillian Garcia) of Divas the WWE compared to the men. Confining portions of them to one roster would be ludicrous since the goal for any wrestler is to be the champion, and the WWE Women’s Championship is a Raw title. I can’t remember a time when it was defended anywhere else outside of a pay per view.
Now WWE has made it very possible for any diva to compete and/or win the title, so it’s time to focus on the division itself. There’s no way this column or an abundance of columns written by any reader is going to change the McMentality where it concerns women: WWE has a knack for hiring models to fill out the division. In some cases, you get lucky. Candice a perfect example. She lacked the basic fundamentals of putting on a wrestling match from the word “go,†and even she knew it. A few years later, here we are praising her for trying to better herself in the ring and cringing that someone who has a chance to make it keeps winding up injured. But for every Candice, there are always going to be your Ashley’s.
The hardest thing for me to swallow is WWE’s reliance on models when there are attractive women in wrestling as is. They’re the best of both worlds. But since we’re not going to change that, let’s put the focus on the cards that are already on the table. We’re always going to have talented wrestlers and models on our screens. As long as the ratings bomb known as the Diva Search exists.
Just to be clear before I get knee deep into this, I’m going to be reasonable. I’m not going to talk about brining in someone from TNA. I’m not going to call for anyone to be released for one reason or another. This is just me taking a stab at what WWE currently has and righting the ship.
Ashley – There’s absolutely nothing wrong with a tomboy character. ODB and her ability to get over with the TNA crowds should be proof enough. The stark contrast between these two is their bodies. No one is saying Ashley needs to bulk up, but there’s nothing wrong with having some meat on those bones. If she can get herself in healthy shape, all she needs to do is train.
Beth Phoenix – Arguably the most dominant female in wrestling today. There’s nothing more to add. WWE took an already attractive woman and made her a legitimate bad ass, hence the nickname—“The Glamazon.†Each diva seems to have one big run in the company, with or without the title. We are currently in the midst of that right now.
Candice – If Candice can come back healthy and stays healthy, she has all of the potential in the world to be a big success story. Let’s just see how this plays out.
Cherry – I’m going to step out on a limb here and say that this is the most underrated character on the list. Cherry has a cute, innocent, girl next door aspect to her, and WWE has been playing up her timidity. When she was crying during her match with Victoria, it was perfect. It symbolized everything this character should be: a shy underdog that eventually becomes her own and that the fans can get behind. In time, the character can be tweaked with a heel turn like Rizzo from Grease (the tough one) or even just like a “whatever†sorority type. While she hasn’t seen much action on TV, what we have seen coupled with her non-televised work is solid enough.
Eve Torres – It’s almost too early to judge Eve. It’s apparent she has no real experience, seeing as how her first real work consisted of an obstacle course.
Jillian Hall – The singing gimmick has run its course, and should be phased out entirely. Being that she’s one of the women who’s actually trained to wrestle for a living, she should definitely still be under contract. There might be a future for her teaming with Melina, as she has on multiple occasions. If they can be built up as a team to the point where they split, both could benefit in a nice way.
Katie Lee Burchill – Mercifully, the incest seeds haven’t sprouted in Katie Lee’s character yet, or at least I’m just clueless. The rampant rumor that’s surfed the net has been that Katie Lee and her “brother†Paul are incestuous, but so far, all I’ve seen is a brother and sister combo looking to dominate. No weird segments in the dressing room with them both showering together or anything off the wall like that. That’s a plus. If WWE commits to both of them, Paul and Katie Lee could have a good mid-card run mimicking that of Triple H and Stephanie, or Edge and Lita, only without the sexuality. Two champions in one family.
Kelly Kelly – Saddled with the worst name since Bertha Faye, Kelly Kelly brings nothing to the ring. I still can’t get the image of Kelly and Layla “wrestling†on ECW months ago out of my head. Jackie Gayda probably even got a laugh out of it. To be fair, I don’t believe she is suited for the ring. “Kelly’s Expose†aside, I think she has a Miss Elizabeth quality to her so much that I would blatantly copy that run and not look back.
Layla – Since winning the Diva Search, she’s worked hard on some of the basics in wrestling, like how she carries herself in interviews or at ringside. I especially like her facials. With some training, she could be on to something.
Lena Yada – Honestly, I don’t know enough about Lena Yada, nor have I seen all that much of her. Like Eve, it might be too early to call this one.
Maria – The center of the “non-worker†divas. Maria had a great place as a dim backstage announcer, and then moved on to a great piece of television with Santino Marella. She’s slowly improving in the ring, but has a big hill to climb. The difference between Maria and a lot of Diva Search contestants is in the way she carries herself professionally. Maria gives off a feeling of someone who feels blessed that she’s found a job in WWE and as someone who has come to love the business and what she does for a living. That’s a trait we don’t see enough of in men and women alike.
Maryse – Where’s La Resistance when you need them? Unless WWE is going to revisit the Deuce/Domino/Cherry stuff they taped, put online, then forgot, Maryse is going to need some training and definitely someone by her side to complement her accent.
Melina – Melina’s run was cut short by Beth Phoenix rise, but she still has some upside to her. Her character isn’t as fresh any more, but she still pulls it off. I think my suggestions regarding Jillian Hall speak well for what I’d do with Melina.
Michelle McCool – Michelle McCool is the new Stacy Kiebler, only she’s getting in the ring. She’s the perfect “All American Girl†character. Another girl who needs some training and an opportunity.
Mickie James – Mickie is veteran for this division. Where babyfaces have work with Victoria that can improve them, heels have Mickie. Neither Mickie nor Victoria is an enhancement talent, since both have upsides. Mickie connects with the fans, so there’s not much you really need to do with her but let he do her thing.
Natalya – While Kelly Kelly has a horrible name, Natalya had a marketable name that they don’t even use. I guarantee you if this were Brooke Hogan or Megan or Ashley Fleihr, you’d be hearing the last name Neidhart every five seconds. Is Cody Rhodes just known as “Cody� Do they call him “Cody Runnels� Sure, Jim Neidhart wasn’t a top singles guys, but he was one half of the company’s most successful teams and a part of a successful stable only 11 years ago, both called The Hart Foundation. I can get past the first name sounding like a Russian Bond girl, but there’s no excuse for not capitalizing on that last night at every chance you can get. She’s got talent for sure, and that laugh is eerie. Her partnership with Victoria is enough to give her time to grow. We got a Women’s Champion in the making right here.
Torrie Wilson – Torrie’s never been much of a worker, but that’s not really her job. She’s not a wrestler. And unfortunately, it looks like her time in the business is just about up. The plus is that she’s got other ventures out there too she’s working on. I’m sure WWE will be “wishing her luck in her future endeavors†at some point.
Victoria – Victoria is the longest tenured competitor amongst the divas. She’s gone in one thousand directions, but always sticks to the root: tough, bitchy, psychopath. Nothing will ever be as good as her partnership with Stevie Richards, but nothing has ever really been bad (besides that God awful dancing). I would expect her to stick around even longer, continue elevating the newer faces, and consistently raising hell.
Past all of this, I think the only other things that WWE is doing or should attempt would be one of the focal point in the list: training. If you want to hire models to be wrestlers, at least give them the tools and the training to succeed. If you don’t, you can’t complain when they put on a bad show. I’m not sure if Finlay still plays a role in this due to his full-time schedule, but it’s hard to ignore the praise he got from past divas. It’s also hard to imagine that someone like Dave Taylor is getting released when helping train the divas is something he could excel at.
The other big thing is to use the divas wisely. You don’t need to cram 12 into a match just for the sake of having a match. On the flipside, you don’t need to focus on only the two in the title picture. WWE seems to be doing that now with the Michelle McCool/Cherry versus Victoria/Natalya feud that’s been heating up for about a month now. Just like the men, the women can feud over anything in the world.
And it doesn’t always have to be about pudding or lingerie.
