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Aaaaand welcome back to Zach's How To Guide everybody. Zach Levine here to take you through the wide world of wide world wrestling. And what better way to take the edge of a stressful work week in the newspaper business than writing about your favorite passion? Let's get this started.
Thank you to those who sent in feedback about last week's Tommy Dreamer column. A majority of people also believe that Dreamer's run shall come to an end at the Extreme Rules PPV, but some great ideas have come out of how to have his last match. Some wanted a barbed-wire match, one wanted Joey Styles to come back and call the match, and a great idea came from a reader to have Raven return for one last appearance and resume his legendary feud with Dreamer.
And finishing up last week's column, we need a name for Maryse's ddt. Ooh la-la and the French Tickler came close, but I think Rene Dupree might get ticked off bout the comparison. From now on though, we shall call Maryse's DDT the "Blonde Bombshell."
So here we are at Chapter 18 - How To Bring Back Mr. Kennedy...Kennedy [Last time I'll do that...I think]
I can remember like yesterday that I was reading online that a new wrestler would be debuting on Velocity. I always watch when a new wrestler debuts, be it Braden Walker or Kizarny [geez btw, FCW's track record is not shaping up to good with the recent stretch of future endeavors] So the man came out and declared himself Ken Anderson. Interesting gimmick, but I thought it was a bit too much at the time.
The next week he debuted against Funaki. Not Kung Fu Naki mind you, old Smackdown's Number 1 Announcer Funaki. Youtube the match if you havent seen it, just for one of the only times that Mr. Kennedy announces his opponent too. Good times.
It's sad I can still do this without looking up wikipedia [trust me], but the week after Funaki, he beat Booker T, Paul London, and then Rey Mysterio before starting his first feud with Hardcore Holly of all people. Anyways, the guy was on fire and started a hell of a run. Yes he was a heel, but fans got behind him and I promise you that his debut year was an awesome time.
So we fast forward a bit. He wins Money in the Bank 23, and then becomes the anti-Lou Gehrig [unluckiest man on the face of the Earth]. It becomes the stuff of legend now, he loses his title shot to Edge due to a shoddy injury call, and loses his spot at Vince's son due to the Signature Pharmacy Scandal. Then he gets redrafted to Smackdown and flounders in a weird mic feud with MVP.
So how do we bring back a man who once showed so much promise and charisma that he got fans to start repeating their last names on cue? Very carefully and strategically my friends. I have read that his name very nearly came up on future endeavor lists, so we need to save him before he goes back to TNA as Kamikaze Ken.
1. Build him back up please. Vignettes are made for people like him. Obviously he doesn't need to be on Wrestlemania, but how bout building him back up in time for a mid-April draft.
2. Get him on ECW. With the draft coming up and ECW normally getting screwed out of its talent, I'm calling already the loss of Christian, Miz, Morrison, and Evan Bourne. Swagger needs someone new to feud with, and what better program to rebuild someone on than the FCW Big Leagues?
3. Let him bring back his Kenton Bomb. Awesome finishing move, and you put him on a different show than Jeff Hardy and everything will be fine to use. Bournes allowed to use the Shooting Star Press, can we please let Kennedy have his first move back, especially now that Big Shad has basically taken the Mic Check as his new finisher.
Speaking of which, that is our game for this week people. Kenton Bomb, Green Bay Plunge, Lambeau Leap. What is the real name for Mr. Kennedy's somersault senton? Email responses to zachlevine86@gmail.com. Winner gets the satisfaction of knowing that they think along my wavelength in terms of finishers haha.
So I thank you all for reading, greatly appreciate it. Please send any and all feedback to the above address. And keep reading pwinsider.com. Best wrestling site on the net bar none.
Stay tuned for next week, Chapter 19 - How To Reestablish Santino Marella
