HOW TO REESTABLISH SANTINO MARELLA
By Zach Levine on 3/19/2009 9:51 AM
How To Guide - How To Reestablish Santino Marella
Aaaaand welcome back to Zach's How To Guide. My name is Zach Levine and here we are with a look at the wide world of wrestling. Mighty exciting time coming up with Wrestlemania just around the corner, but we have some time to kill before we get to the Granddaddy of them All...so let's get to it.
Last week we discussed bringing back Mr. Kennedy...KENNEDY!!! Thanks to all who sent in feedback, it seems like people want him to come back on ECW as well. And kudos to those who sent in names for his old finisher, which shall henceforth be known as the Lambeau Leap.
So here we are at Chapter 19...How To Reestablish Santino Marella. Perhaps the funniest wrestler in this decade, he has let his personality shine through and through. But before we look to where we're going, we need to see where he's been. So let's take a look.
Many diehards first heard of Santino not when he had his online show and not when Snoop clotheslined him at last year's Mania. Perhaps the first time many heard from him was when James E Cornette slapped the everloving bejesus out of him for laughing at the Boogeyman gimmick in OVW. This obviously led to the dismissal of Cornette from OVW, and led to him going to TNA and downplaying the effect of Vince Russo, so actually maybe a win-win for all.
Now I remember his debut like yesterday. He was a "fan" who was selected from the crowd to fight Umaga for the intercontinental title. My computer was down, which killed me because a new superstar debuted and I wasn't able to immediately jump on pwinsider and find out who Santino Marella really was.
Quick sidebar - To show the importance of the internet, I remember watching ECW earlier that same year and being shocked when Monty Brown debuted as Marcus Cor Von. If I had my internet up and working, I still would have been surprised, but not as much so. So a quick lesson to you all, sometimes being a mark is a good thing.
Ok back to business. So Santino was the IC Champ, only problem is he barely fought. For a while I swore his finisher was a roll-up.. And it's not like he couldn't wrestle, the guy was apparently a great grappler in OVW. So when you are a babyface rag doll who can't fight, the fans quickly turn on you. Just watch his Night Of Champions Match against Umaga to see what I'm talking about. The fans just wanted to see his Italian ass whooped by the Samoan Bulldozer.
So the WWE turns him into a heel, and a comedic one at that. The gimmick did pretty well and Santino saw him great timing. But what he has in charisma, he severely lacks in fighting. The only competitive match I can remember him having in the WWE in the last two years was when he fought Chris Jericho in an 8 minute match on RAW. Hell his second most competitive match was against Jimmy Kimmel's surprisingly game Cousin Sal.
Once he was paired with Beth, he became a complete an utter joke. Hell he got knocked out of the Royal Rumble in 1.9 seconds. Why even have him? There has to be something else which we can do with him. Lets look at our options...
1. Continue on his path. Yes he's a funny heel, but the second he's in a match we know what the outcome is going to be. I would have loved to see him in the Elimination Chamber or Money in the Bank, but no such luck. My feeling is that he stays on the path he is in, he will get future endeavored by Summerslam.
2. Heel manager. Give him a stable of people other than Beth Pheonix and Rosa Mendez. Only problem is, you look at guys like Armando Estrada and Daivari, and you see how well male managers have fared in recent years. The only male manager who has recently been successful is either Runjin Singh or [shudder] Kute Kip.
3. Color Commentator. Apparently this was what Scotty Goldman was set up for before he was future endeavored himself, so why not give it to this charismatic guy. Saved Matt Striker's career, could work for Santino. I can't see Lawler going on for another ten years. [but I said that 10 years ago, so who knows]
4. My personal choice - new RAW GM. Leave Vicki on Smackdown, leave Teddy on ECW, and why not make him RAWs general manager. Could make for some funny moments, and if he ends up getting whooped every RAW by a face who dislikes his ideas, so be it.
So there you have it, lots of options for the Italian Sonamagun. Speaking of which, the only finisher I can remember him doing was a diving headbutt where he saluted the crowd first. Let's give that name a finisher my friends.
Please send any and all feedback to
zachlevine86@gmail.com Thanks for reading and stay tuned for Chapter 20 - How To Book Danny Bonaduce at Lockdown [I promise you it will be worth it] Until next time...
