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HOW TO BOOK BONADUCE VS. YOUNG

Hey everybody and welcome back to Zach's How To Guide. I am your friendly neighborhood wrestling columnist Zach Levine and this is another chapter of Zach's How To Guide. Right now we are at Chapter 20, or something like that, I've sadly lost count. But thanks to all my continued readers and lets have some fun here.

Last week I wrote a column about how to reestablish Santino Marella. And what does the WWE do? They have him fight against Mickie James with both hands tied back his back [I'm slapping my forehead right now]. Poor guy, I think Braden Walker is higher than him on the WWE totem pole right now.

I also asked for responses to what we should call his diving headbutt, thanks to all who replied, and I'm gonna go with the Sonamagun.

Okay, now bare with me this week, but I'm gonna go a little outside the box for my column. TNA subjects are hard to come by, but when I heard they want to book Danny Bonaduce of all people for Lockdown, I saw it as an opportunity that was far too good to pass up.

Mr. Bonaduce has had some career in recent years. I'm hoping TNA won't continuously mention the Partridge Family during the match, as it may fly over the heads over all their young audience. Instead, how about mentioning every reality show he's been on in the last decade.

Now let me preface this by saying I am a big fan of Adam Carolla, Bonaduce's former radio mate. Couldn't stand the Duce man on the show, and always thought he was a bit too brash for my taste.

Go to Breaking Bonaduce, Celebrity Boxing, and Hulk Hogan's CCW, and my dislike of the man grew and grew. But I also realized something else, the man is certifiably nuts. As a loyal follower of CCW [I think I died a little inside saying that :( ], that Bonaduce-Diamond hardcore match was one of the craziest fights I have seen in some time.

When I heard out he was fighting at Lockdown, I immediately thought Eric Young would be his ideal opponent. Say what you will about EY, as many people have, but he is a solid hand. The man once bladed against Judas Mesias of all people. When you put over Judas, you are a solid hand.

So we have Bonaduce-Young match at lockdown. I'll say it, I'm intrigued. Young could carry him to a good match, and I think Bonaduce is crazy enough to pull out some absurd moves. I don't know what to expect from the red head here. I have a feeling though that he is going to bleed buckets, dive from the top of the cage, and have absolutely no regard for his or Young's body.

So I wrap it up saying that expect the unexpected from this match. Bonaduce is a sick, sick man, and I think EY can pull a good match out of him. Compared to other celebrity matches, I'm gonna stake this one just below Mayweather-Show, and 10 rungs above any match which involved Karl Malone or Jay Leno.

For the name game this week, let's give a good nickname to Bonaduce, mainly because Eric Young and Danny Bonaduce are two of the worst wrestling names in history, and one of them should be able to be a showman. Please send your ideas to zachlevine86@gmail.com

Thanks all for reading and stay tuned for next week's column, How To Book Wrestlemania 25.