We have moved into the second half of our current season of The Ultimate Fighter, and the feud between coaches is at a fever pitch. For months, the tension between them has been escalating, and as May draws to a close, we can’t help but wonder whether they can make it to their eventual showdown in the cage without coming to blows first.
Of course, this would be a ringing endorsement for the show if the red-hot feud wasn’t between last season’s coaches. But, as UFC 114 approaches, the UFC has begun hyping the main event between Rashad Evans and Quinton “Rampage” Jackson while continuing to feed us a ho-hum season of TUF, which features current coaches Chuck Liddell and Tito Ortiz pretty much phoning it in. Knowing that the two won’t be squaring off at the end of the season isn’t even a disappointment anymore; if anything, it’s a relief.
Also feeling some relief: four fighters still in the competition, despite having lost during (or even before) the preliminary round. Tonight, wildcard-berth recipients Kyacey Uscola and Kris McCray will battle for the final spot in the quarterfinal round. It is appropriate, then, that we begin this week’s episode with Kyacey celebrating not only a berth, but also a birth, as he finds out that he has a newborn son back home. After an emotional phone conversation with his baby mama, however, Kyacey tells us that he needs to stay focused, and vows to “put an ass-kickin’” on Kris.
Perhaps as a way to make up for wasting our time with this entire season, the show’s producers have elected to not waste any time getting the action started, as it is already Fight Day. Kris says he doesn’t want to have fight a teammate, but despite being an underdog believes he will prevail. Kyacey, on the other hand, says the birth of his son has inspired him to win. Tito, for the record, has elected to stay neutral for this fight, promising to sit silently in the bleachers and let his two fighters compete on their own. In other words, he’s going to borrow the same coaching strategy Chuck has been using all season.
The fight starts with both guys looking very tentative, though Kyacey lands a couple of exploratory strikes. About a minute into the round, he throws a straight kick at Kris’ knee, then stands idly while Kris dramatically doubles over and winces in pain. What is this, “The Karate Kid”? Unfortunately, no one yells for a bodybag, and instead the action continues with Kris holding Kyacey against the cage until an inadvertent low blow leads to a timeout. The fight resumes quickly, however, and the final 90 seconds of the round feature Kris landing the better strikes, scoring a nice-looking takedown, and controlling Kyacey on the ground.
Round 2 begins with Kris taking Kyacey down again, and moving quickly toward a submission. Kris secures an arm and cranks it at a grotesque angle, causing Kyacey to tap out…and cornerman Jamie Yager to repeatedly shout “yes,” as if he was Diego Sanchez. As Tito congratulates him, Kris lets us know that he is in a still-developing “embryo stage” but will be “hatching real soon.” Gee, can’t wait.
It’s time to select the quarterfinal matchups, meaning someone has rousted Chuck to make a halfhearted appearance on behalf of his team. Based on the blinds and furniture in the room, apparently UFC president Dana White has gone for a ’70s-themed meeting. Actually, if it means going back to a time prior to the existence of this season, I’m all for it. Dana starts the process by asking Chuck for his opinion on the best four remaining fighters, to which Chuck responds with a hilariously aloof non-answer, mumbling sentiments like “I don’t know” and “it doesn’t matter.” As Tito laughs at Chuck’s apparent disgust with the show, I find myself seriously wondering if Chuck even knows who half of the fighters are. Actually, I find myself seriously wondering if Chuck even knows what day it is. After bickering briefly about whether Court McGee should fight Nick Ring or Jamie, the coaches walk out without providing any real input, leaving the matchmaking process to Dana. I had a feeling I wasn’t alone in being bored with this season; I just didn’t think that the two coaches would be among those standing alongside me.
It’s time to announce the matchups, and Dana tells the fighters that he personally made the selections after Chuck and Tito disagreed “on everything.” Translation: a barely conscious Chuck and a whiny Tito tepidly spatted over a single issue for about 45 seconds and walked out, leaving Dana holding the bag. Our first bout will feature Court vs. Nick, which was the fight that Tito wanted. As Tito gloats in his small victory, Chuck responds by saying, “I don’t really care.” Understatement, anyone? The next matchup announced is between “Minority Report” clique members Kyle Noke and Kris, followed by Brad Tavares vs. Seth Baczynski and, finally, Jamie against Josh Bryant. Tito likes the matchups, as does Chuck, who seems surprised to hear himself reach the obvious conclusion that his team can potentially sweep all four fights.
Back at the house, a homeless transient has made his way past security and through the front door. No wait, that’s TUF alumnus Forrest Griffin, wearing a nasty beard and ominous coat. Forrest announces to the underwhelmed group that they will spend the next two hours playing the yet-to-be-released “UFC Unleashed 2010” video game, which is an appropriate time window, considering that this segment feels like a two-hour commercial for the game.
Although he has been slotted to compete in the first quarterfinal fight, Nick Ring has elected to see a doctor about his knee, which has appeared on the verge of collapse for several weeks now. An MRI reveals that the tissue around Nick’s kneecap is highly unstable, leaving him to worry that his joints could become more badly damaged than the credibility of this show. Nick informs us that he is considering pulling oat of the tournament and having surgery, and within hours, Dana shows up at the house to make an announcement.
After watching Dana walk into the house and summon Nick for a private meeting, previously eliminated James Hammortree is clearly excited about the prospects of re-entering the competition, realizing that Dana’s appearance means that “somebody’s future is doing something different than it was doing before.” Um, if it’s the future, how was it doing anything before? Sure enough, Nick lets Dana know that he can’t fight in the quarterfinals, leading Dana to go back inside and share the news. Dana tells everyone he will consult with the coaches to determine whether Joe Henle or James will fight Court, but as he walks back out to his SUV, James chases him down and asks to be chosen. Just like that, Dana walks back in and reveals that James has the slot.
OK, let’s think about this. First, Dana has completely backtracked on his plan to talk to the coaches. Second, despite James ending up on a stretcher after his preliminary-round bout, Dana doesn’t bother confirming with a doctor that James is even cleared to compete. Third, he makes a snap judgment based on one person’s decision to speak up, using it as the solitary criterion for not considering Joe. It’s hard to believe, but the legitimacy of a five-year franchise has imploded in a matter of minutes thanks to one man’s ego. Way to go, Dana. Later, Joe makes a limp attempt to plead his case, but Dana has stopped listening. Which is appropriate, because I’m guessing a lot of people have stopped watching.
After both guys make weight, we’re ready to fight. Both guys come out looking to establish the standup game, which Court finally does by catching a kick and landing a few punches. Court then gets a takedown, but James escapes almost immediately. Back on their feet, both guys start to swing, with Court landing the better shots and earning another takedown. James escapes again, only to eat a few more solid punches, but winds up taking Court’s back after a poorly executed spin-kick attempt. Court regains top position, however, and finishes out the round there.
It is at this point that tonight’s episode gets even worse, as the show mysteriously goes into an unannounced overrun, meaning anyone who recorded the show will not get to see the end of the fight. Turns out they won’t miss much, though – the second round starts with James going for a takedown, getting caught in a standing guillotine, and tapping out. Court has advanced to the semifinals, leading Dana to say that things are “getting interesting.” There are a lot of things this show is starting to become, but “interesting” is not one of them.
Random thoughts:
Upon reflecting on last week’s fight, which is sadder: Joe having made it onto the show with such a remedial skills set, or Seth allowing last week’s fight to go to a third round?
Who in the world decided that, given his preliminary-round performance, Kris deserved the wildcard berth over James?
Did Kyacey really give his son the middle name “Champ”?
Doesn’t it seem like the famously rigid phone-use restrictions on this show have become a lot more lax during the past few seasons?
Why did Tito say that “the better man will win” as a result of his decision to not coach either fighter in the wildcard bout?
I mean, wouldn’t the better man win, regardless of who was in whose corner?
Considering he had promised to stay silent in the bleachers, why couldn’t Tito shut up before the bout started?
Did you notice, though, how silent the gym was during the first minute of the fight?
How come referee Steve Mazzagatti didn’t return the fighters to their previous position after the inadvertent low blow, instead having them start in a neutral stance?
Why is Dana’s microphone turned up so loud during the fights?
Did you notice that, during the UFC Primetime ad that aired between rounds, Rashad Evans has changed his nickname to “Suga”?
How nasty did Kyacey’s arm look during the fight-ending submission?
Does anyone think Kyacey felt better after a victorious Kris told him, “Don’t worry about it”?
When Chuck walked into the quarterfinal-selection meeting while sending a text message, didn’t it perfectly sum up his level of interest in the show this season?
What was with the décor in the room where the quarterfinal fights were selected?
Jeez, could either of the coaches have been any less interested in participating in selecting the quarterfinal fights?
And if the coaches don’t care, why should anyone expect the viewers to?
Why did Kyle and Kris spend more time hugging than mugging during their faceoff?
Why would Chuck hope that sweeping the quarterfinals would result in Tito going home, considering that Chuck is pretty much never around anyway?
Could the guys in the house have looked any less interested in the arrival of Forrest?
And, could the UFC have found a less-enthusiastic pitchman for the game?
Didn’t you love seeing Kimbo Slice featured on the game, considering he isn’t even on the UFC roster anymore?
During this week’s throwaway “Inside the Octagon” segment, was anyone excited about the prospect of wasting hours on their computer, using a poor man’s PhotoShop to “make your own fighter”?
Why did Dana start his meeting with Nick by saying “talk to me,” when Nick didn’t know what the meeting was about in the first place?
Didn’t you like how Nick had such a decisive attitude about dropping out, yet hadn’t bothered letting Dana know?
Is anyone else getting tired of hearing Dana suggest that guys are wimps for not fighting, even though he’s not the one having to endure the pain or the prospect of a career-ending injury?
Did Dana change his mind about consulting the coaches after realizing they probably wouldn’t care about who replaced Nick?
Not that Joe would have won anyway, but how weak is it that he didn’t even get to be fairly considered to be Nick’s replacement?
Are you surprised that Chuck didn’t seem at all upset that his guy got a raw deal, and made no attempt to even talk to Dana on Joe’s behalf?
I can understand a live program exceeding its time window, but how does a taped show go beyond its limit?
Wasn’t it nice to see Joe being so enthusiastic about Court’s victory, even though he could have sulked over the screwjob that cost him his chance to compete?
When they showed next week’s preview, did I actually see signs of life from Chuck?
And isn’t the timing ironic, considering everything else this season has begun to flatline?
Mark Carpowich can be contacted at markcarpowich@hotmail.com.