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By PWInsiderXtra Readers on 9/11/2007 11:31 AM
Raw opened predictably enough with the McMahon bastard son scandal recap. We all knew this was coming and I didn't really have a problem with it since it was all going to be cleared up tonight. Pretty slow-going and uninteresting but JBL got in a couple kinda funny jabs. Khali.... if that was my kid and he didn't eat me before I had the chance I would enforce the children shouldn't be seen OR heard rule on him. Maybe one day we'll get lucky and the World Wildlife Fund will find a way to sue the WWE for Khali's name and likeness and all future references to him on video will have to be blurred out. 

Speaking of which I'm pretty sure that lawyer Johnson has the same acting coach as Khali's translator. I've saw more believable acting in Trauma films. 

Recap of London and Kendrick becoming #1 contenders to tag titles and in a rare and pleasant surprise WWE acknowledges the brief title swap in South Africa. Wish they'd do more of this.

Paul London vs. Lance Cade was a decent bout to start off with. I've saw both have better matches in the past but not bad. Kendrick using heel tactics to help London get the win I didn't really expect; but it didn't overly surprise me either. And of course once again JR praises the baby faces cheating when if it's heels doing this kind of thing he loses his voice for a week in despair. But hey, he's JR. He can do whatever he wants as far as I'm concerned. 

Cena's been banned from the building! Look at all those professional looking security guys surrounding the entire building! No WAY is he getting in there...

Triple H once again confuses me by being DX Triple H for one sketch before coming out as the intense King of Kings later only to fall right back into goofball H. Pick a road and drive down it please.

Cena-Orton head kicking extravaganza recap. Whatever.

Big Stevie Cool is on RAW!!! Only to be berated on air by his real life boss. But it was pretty funny.

Carlito's got a surprise for Triple H. He will fase someone who has beaten him several times in the past. I actually went through the roster in my head on this one trying to figure out who the heck they were talking about since I knew it wouldn't be Cena and couldn't think of anyone else. 
Then we have The Game Vs. Shelton Benjamin.

Oh yeah!!! Apparently WWE wants us to now remember Benjamin once was being pushed to the moon for about 3 weeks as a threat. THREE YEARS AGO. Ever since then he's been in low card hell losing match after match.

Could it be the new hairstyle is having a positive impact? One Triple H quasi-squash later proves that's not the case. Thanks for coming Shelton.
Now the Unforgiven match between The H and Carlito will be a No DQ match except only benefiting Carlito. That's actually pretty cool. It's probably been done before but I can't think of any instance off the top of my head. Though I have a feeling that Carlito is about to get buried down the ladder a bit more since I don't see him winning. And if you can't win with those odds on your side prepare to be looked at as much less of a threat. 

Orton comes out to run down the Cena family. Yeah Yeah. I'm bored of both Orton and Cena. Wait is that Cena coming through the crowd?!?!?! You mean he got through all that security??? Never saw that one coming. One shoddy looking confrontation later and Orton retreats to the back as Cena attempts his Umaga impersonation. Good thing all those much smaller, doughy guys were standing in Cena's way for Orton. 
Cena promo in the back to Vince. It was ok but I thought it was a little forced at the end.

Mickie James vs. Jillian Hall had a horrible looking match due in no part to poor Mickie James. Candice Michelle on commentary for some reason is putting over her opponent at Unforgiven as if she's scared to death of Phoenix and has no chance. Actually I can't say I blame her for that one. 

I liked that she got in the ring when Beth came out and stood up to her for all the good it did her. Pretty good angle building up Phoenix as a legit threat.

Santino Marella vs. Sandman was not even a match. But I have to say Santino has gotten over with me as the snobbish prick heel. He's funny and has good comedic timing. The cut on Austin and the Condemned was hilarious as was his botched attempt at breaking the Kendo stick. Good stuff. It looked like Sandman may have legit hurt his knee/leg as he was hopping through the rest of the confrontation as well as later. Hope not. Santino attacks Ron "Damn" Simmons in the back. Wonder if this will lead to a one shot return of the former Acolyte in the ring? 

The Great Khali vs. Jeff Hardy sees Jeff getting squashed (almost literally) in Rey Mysterio fashion. The only real problem I have with this is why in the world they'd book the RAW Intercontinental Champion in a squash match in which he can never get any heat back on since Khali is on a different brand. And hell we know Matt Hardy was in the back so why didn't he come out to try and help his brother? That could've been interesting because then MVP could've gotten involved too to try and "protect" his tag team partner from harm before their match at Unforgiven with D&D. And why did Batista wait so long to come out? Does he just not like Jeff or was he being fashionably late? I'm probably reading wayyy too much into a Khali match. 

Well now comes the part we've all been waiting for. The answer to who is the bastard son of Vince McMahon.

They slowly weed out the possibilities and in a surreal moment Balls Mahoney not only is acknowledged by McMahon but a Balls chant is audible in the crowd! I don't know how he's stayed over all these years but I'm starting to think that Satanic stuff isn't all just for show! Vince tries to gently let the crowd down to the fact their hometown hero Kennedy is in no way going to be the son. The Triple H swerve I saw coming a mile off and the second they went down that route I knew who it was going to be. Hornswoggle (who we learned on PWI earlier is also a semi-local boy) is the son! 

OK it was pretty funny especially Triple H ragging on Vince and the leg hugging. But they have taken a story line they have drug out over several weeks and turned it into what I can't see being more than a one shot pop. I just can't see it going anywhere. Kind of like the Gobbledy-gooker. OK not that bad but still. That being said I DO understand they kind of had their hands tied here with the suspensions wrecking the original plan so they had to make do. But man they could've given the rub to one of the up and coming young guys they see as having long term potential like they were going to do with Kennedy. I don't know who exactly would fit that bill. Hell they could've turned Cody Rhodes slowly heel as revealing his mother had an affair with McMahon and have Cody slowly turn on big Dust to join his "real" father to massive heel heat. I mean come on it's not any more out of the realm of possibility than Vince sleeping around with Leprechauns. 

All in all I was pretty disappointed in the show. I expected more out of it since they knew they'd most likely get a higher viewership due to the closing of this angle. But it was just very lack-luster and dull to me. If you didn't see it just read the recap or watch AM RAW Saturday Night which is sometimes sublime in the fact it's only an hour with alot edited out. Either way I wouldn't go out of my way trying to find a copy of it. 

Bristol, TN


I hope WWE realizes that they just wasted two months of a main event storyline for one "haha" moment. Hornswoggle?!? Come on, what's going to become of this? So what if the Kennedy thing didn't work out, give someone else deserving a push, like Val Venis!

Only real good that came out of Raw was, dare I say, Santino Marella. I thought he was buried after last week with a suspension, but each week I find him to be more and more humorous and entertaining. But we did have to see him wrestle.

We also got to see Great Khali no-sell a bunch of moves and crush Jeff Hardy's skull (good way to give credibility to the Intercontinental Championship!), we got to see that even 9 security guards can't restrain John Cena, and we got to see a talent of Shelton Benjamin's caliber job to Triple H.

Overall, I wasn't impressed with Raw and, even coming from a long time WWE fan, I can't wait for TNA Impact to expand to two hours.

-Sean J. Ryan


Hornswoggle! Hornswoggle! Hornswoggle!


P.S. - Hornswoggle!


I know the suspensions were a major blow to this whole “bastard” build up, but I’m still confused as to the choice of Hornswoggle as Vince’s illegitimate spawn. After weeks of on-air time being devoted to this subject, the winner of Vince’s lucky sperm contest is a gimmick performer? Cruiserweight champion or not, Hornswoggle’s abilities are clearly limited. Where does (or can) the storyline go from here? Wait, I think I know the answer already. Future segments regarding this “father from Hell and son of Satan” will be lame, time consuming, will continue to over expose Vince, and will do nothing to improve the actual “product” presented to fans each week.

Just when I think that Vince and/or Creative have hit rock bottom, they surprise me and keep digging. This convoluted and near worthless storyline goes a long way in explaining why I’m watching less and less wrestling and only keeping up with the business through this web site.

Baton Rouge, LA